Saturday, February 14, 2015

Expectations

Hello everyone.

First of all happy new year! May all the things you asked for this year happen to you. I've been busy doing nothing. I did get into a car accident the day after christmas and I've been having a hard time the past month of december however I am so glad that 2014 is done, because I had a terrible year. I feel like I have put my entire life on pause the past four years and I don't really know where I am going. Now that I've realized that I do have a right to voice out what I feel and say what I have to say I am confused and I realize that there are things that I am scared of saying and doing, because I haven't done them throughout my life.

I started seeing someone to help me out with my anxiety issues and so far we've gotten that my anxiety issues for the most part are traced back to my job, and I know I should look for something different, because at one point in my life I was very happy with what I did for a living, but lately I feel like I'm no longer content with what I do, and the more I have to go to my job the more anxiety I feel. I can't sleep. I can't eat. I can't do anything just knowing that I have to go to work the next day or in a few hours, but at the same time I'm anxious about not having an income and that stresses me out a lot.

I have an odd feeling though as of the end of last year I feel like things are going to change this year I feel like everything I ever wanted and have worked for is finally going to start rewarding me for my hard work.  I don't think that this is me being an optimist I feel like this is me being a realist.

-Fatima

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